unbelievable!!!

I think I have mentioned this a couple of times [or not] but my daughter and her boyfriend have attempted to see each other, now it has been two weeks. But next week, they have two activities planned on Tuesday and Thursday. I have a meeting on Thursday, so I won't get to join them. I plan on being out kind of late...talking...with the facilitator's of ALR. How come it has to be so darn difficult? They are kids, in public, nonetheless, majority in the precense of parents. I know we want to protect our children, but when will they ever learn love? Sometimes I think that our emotions, surroundings, encourage us to grow even faster. "emotions" It can control little and BIG things. I just want my daughter to be happy. I love her just the way she is (sometimes).

a SAD moment

Last night, my family and I just hanging out in the master bedroom. My husband just got dog food and new toys for the boys. Thai left his baby somewhere in the house --Max's baby was in our room. He [Max] looked sad. He didn't play with his toy, nor the ball that was right there, but just walked right past it and laid on the ground. Thai on the other hand, was playing with Max's toy, amusing himself. I just realized that Max was getting old. He was even acting old. I had him get on the bed with me and my husband, but he wouldn't chipper up. He laid down next to my husband, looking very sad.

I'm scared of my reaction if anything happens to Max. I want to take him to the vet, but I am also scared of getting news, if any. He is almost 7 years old, but he is a large dog.

Father's Day...

Father's Day is over rated right? Everyone has a mother, but not everyone has a father. Or at least for me. I had a father, I talked to him and see he randomly when I was young. I haven't seen my father in over 13 years. Am I angry? Maybe? I don't even know what to say...not having a father presence in my life...did it really make a difference? Yes, it did...I'm paranoid, afraid of being abadoned...etc. My outlook on men ~ isn't all that either...the feeling that they are "useless" seriously comes to mind.

Yeah...the A/C is FIXED!!

I finally went to bed...got up early and called at 8 a.m., then by 10 a.m. the repairman was at my house & by noon he was done and it was fixed. Oh yes, for a price though. It did cut into my father's day budget. Oh well, I am sure my husband can't be too disappointed. I tried, right? I got him another flat screen tv. Since he broke the other one...and we just can't see on the really small t.v. that we are currently using and the wall just looks BAD. Also, I don't want to encourage his BAD behavior. Oh well, my daughter and I put it in the basement. Hopefully, father's day this year won't be sooo bad.

I went to my friend's baby's baptismal. Well technically I missed the baptism because of the repairman, so I made it to the potluck. Oooh, I love babies, but only for so long, hee:) They are so cute and cuddly, then they grow up.

I am SUPER tired today, but I am trying not to sleep too early. I have been all weird all week long. Trying to take all of my meds, which reminds me that I almost forgot to take all of my medication today. It was so dumb, I had to turn around and go back home to have my daughter get them.

I think maybe I am spending too much time with my daughter and her boyfriend. I am like their third wheel. I kind of intervene in their conversations, etc. I need to find a life?? Technically, I do have a busy life, I just multitask, ontop of each and other thing that I am doing. Why can't I relax? I'm probably going to hurt myself before I ever slow down.

air conditioning issues...

Yes, my a/c all of a sudden stopped working today. It is supposed to be very HOT this weekend. I don't know if I can survive without air conditioning with my condition. I'm so tired, but I'm hot, irritable and it is the middle of summer. It is about midnight and tomorrow is Saturday, so I am not sure who will be able to come out the same day!! I don't think that I could stay home all day if the house is like an oven.

WHY? I can't stand it....I will melt, literally. I am pre-menapausal...so it doesn't help either. I am wondering if I should go to the baby shower tomorrow in Aurora b/c I can only go to the mall and where else? I need shelter until the air conditioning is working.

PRAY, please!!! I think I am pretty desperate!